Ash Wednesday...Getting and Giving Up

The church was filled with a hundred or so people...orchestral music was playing...the lights were slightly dimmed.

A line began to form at the front and steadily the chapel began to fill with foreheads marked with a black cross.

Or, what looked like a cross.

At first glance it looked kind of creepy. I have to admit what immediately popped into my mind was some call back references in Revelation where people would be "marked with a sign on their foreheads."

Horrible! I know!!! But it's true.

But...after I got over my initial apocalyptic response, I realized it is something so beautiful.

I approach the front and knell, quietly saying a prayer and waiting....

I'm so thankful to get to experience my faith in this way, I'm excited for what God is going to teach me during this time, and I'm blessed to get to walk this journey with a man I love.

I begin to hear the words of the pastors as they mark each person's forehead.

"From ashes you came, to ashes you will return, repent and hear the Good News that is Christ our Lord"

And I turn around, walking back to my seat and I see....

A sea of faces all marked with a cross...

A life touched by the life, death and resurrection of Christ...

A life changed by the Good News...

A life focused, if only for a moment or so on Christ.

It was a wonderful experience.

And while Ash Wednesday is about mourning one's sin I have to share this not so sorrowful looking photo.

And as I repent and express gratitude for the weight of a sin I do not have to carry, for a sacrifice I did not have to make, for an eternal life I have but do not deserve I begin my Lenten experience.

~*~*~*

Each week I will be sacrificing and focusing on various things.

This week, I'm sacrificing chocolate. Which initially didn't seem that difficult. But having a craving for something sweet after being at work for 9 hours and sitting in a teen girls group who are all partaking in chocolate and having to opt out for a jolly rancher is sad...very...very...sad.

I probably shouldn't complain about what I'm giving up for Lent. Right?

But in every moment these past few days when I've really wanted a little chocolate and have had to remind myself I can't have it my attention focuses to God. And in that moment I have a little conversation with Him. In a very small way I'm showing Him I love Him, and I'm thankful.

This week I'm adding additional prayer and Scripture meditation. Which....has been a work in progress. To be brutally honest it's been difficult. I have to remind myself I want to be filled with God's love, with His words, with His character....I don't just want to give up chocolate and eat something else instead.

That would be pointless.

So forgive me Lord when I misstep so early on in my journey. Please don't ask me about my lengthy list of New Year's resolutions tucked away in my drawer....Let's start again tomorrow.

In His Grace,

April Marie